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The Stress Risk for A-type HSPs

July 15, 2017

When you’re Highly Sensitive you’re more observant. This makes you more perceptive to your environment and what is needed. This can make you more responsible, more creative and give you a strong drive to do good. When you’re an A-type personality, an achiever, chances are that you’re not just Highly Sensitive, you’re also a Sensation […]

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Safe Space for Sensitives: the prerequisite for change

March 25, 2012

  As a Highly Sensitive person, it probably takes you longer to get used to new things. There are just so many subtleties to process! So when you are faced with a lot of newness, having the old and familiar handy can be a life saver. The ugly sweater you never really liked can become […]

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HSP & Helpful: 7 Ways Toxic People Convince You to do more for them than you really want to

September 12, 2013

  This post is all about buttons, hidden triggers. Toxic people especially are very good at finding those in others. They find them in order to use them, to manipulate you. Recognizing the buttons doesn’t stop the triggering from happening. Yet, it does help you pull out of a bad situation in time.     1. […]

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Creativity and Stress Management Go Hand in Hand

May 27, 2018

When do you do your best work? Is it when you’re worn down and exhausted? Is it when you’re in fight or flight? Is it when you’re on an adrenaline high? Is it when you’re juggling so many different tasks and projects and responsibilities that you don’t know what is up anymore? Is it when […]

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11 Reasons Why Procrastination May Not be the HSP Problem You Think it is

February 5, 2014

In our market-economy, time is money and getting more things done is often considered of the utmost importance. In this context, procrastination tends to be treated as the evil enemy, how do we beat it? Yet, what if procrastination is not necessarily the problem we assume it is? Let me divert a little to explain […]

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Two Big Reasons Why Being “Too Sensitive” is Completely Beside the Point

March 14, 2019

Other people need to stop telling you that you’re too sensitive – but they won’t. So, what’s left to do? You need to stop telling yourself that you’re too sensitive. Because those are the things that really hurt: the things that others say, that match what we feel deep down inside. If you truly didn’t […]

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What to do when You Feel Rejected for Being Highly Sensitive

February 15, 2013

I’ve been getting a lot of questions lately about being HSP and being or feeling rejected, either in a romantic relationship or in general. This video addresses that. In the first half of the video I discuss two main things to consider when dealing with rejection. In the second half, I clarify how as an […]

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HSP Dilemma: what to do when you can’t stop a conflict no matter what

April 22, 2014

I think it’s fair to say that we HSPs generally don’t like conflict. Stop the war! Stop the bickering! Stop the mounting tension! Ah, if only we could stop it. Yet conflict is part of life. If we get too obsessed with resolving it, then we become a stomped-on doormat. In our desire to create […]

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Sensitivity is Not a Sign that You’re Wrong

April 10, 2018

Being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) is quite the specialised topic. It’s a rather new concept and in many countries, it’s not really taken seriously, unfortunately. What this means is that there are HSPs worried about having phobias or anxiety disorders, when in actuality, they are overstimulated. They don’t realise there is something that they […]

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3 Common Approaches to Dealing with Narcissists – that keep you stuck

April 9, 2018

Dealing with narcissistic people is tough! Yet, without the right core strategy, it’s even tougher. So much so, that many people end up feeling like there’s no effective way to deal with narcissists and be rid of them at all. Here are 3 common approaches that are easy to get stuck in:     1. […]

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Do You Feel Heard? Why & How it Helps to Listen to Yourself First

June 22, 2012

Just as it takes courage to really hear what someone else is saying, it also takes courage to listen to ourselves. It takes saying NO to a lot of distractions, to clear a space, daily, in which we can actually hear ourselves. A space in which our own voices and needs don’t get drowned out […]

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On HSP Hiding & Why Being Seen is Important to Feel Connected

July 30, 2014

As HSPs we know that speaking up about being HSP (and all it entails) can be a slippery slope. Beyond the obvious cultural stigma against being sensitive (with sensitivity being associated with weakness and bursting into tears every other minute or being an easily offended narcissist) there is a deeper fear that often bullies us […]

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Self-Esteem is a Strategy, Not a Thing

May 27, 2018

Self-esteem gets thrown around a lot as if it’s an elusive “thing” that you either do or do not have much of. “Oh, you have low self-esteem” is used a lot as an explanation. When you have low-self esteem you put up with all kinds of abuse, right? But what exactly is self-esteem and why […]

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When Trying to Make Things Work is Making You Feel Hopeless

October 11, 2018

For the creative world-makers it’s hard to hear that this is the way it is and always will be! In fact, chances are, you reject a rigid statement like that. Nothing, absolutely nothing needs to stay the way it is, and it shouldn’t! I applaud your creativity. I understand it. I have it. And I’ve […]

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Why Narcissists Get Stuck in a Negative Rut – and what you need to know to not get sucked down with them

October 20, 2018

This is for all the HSPs and empaths out there who see the sensitivity in a narcissist and relate a little too much. Especially when this person is the covert-narcissist victim type, there’s a lot of resentment, blame and superiority going on underneath the surface, but it won’t be apparent at first. Rather, covert-narcissists love […]

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Has Impossible become your HSP Normal?

July 14, 2017

Is “normalising” as in “making the crazy feel normal” a verb? Google leaves me unsure, since normalising seems to be used mostly to describe bringing things back to a common standard. So, I might be flipping a word pancake upside down here. Either way, the word makes just as much sense – if not more […]

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How Overstimulation burns out HSP Adventurers

September 4, 2017

Overstimulation is a problem for all HSPs. However, it’s particularly tricky for Highly Sensitive Sensation Seekers. Why? Because when you’re overstimulated, you feel bad. Sitting with your feelings of panic, depression, frustration, grief or anything else will probably be the last thing you want to do. What better to take your mind off things than […]

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How can you be both Sensitive and Empowered as a Woman?

October 6, 2015

What is women empowerment really? Empowerment has a bit of a “big trucks” and “being ripped” and “lots of money” ring to it. When we think of empowerment, our mind tends to go to hugely successful people, the rich and famous, or assholes and narcissists, as well as dare-devil bad-asses. As in: perhaps we need […]

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Is HSP Perfectionism a Force for Good or an Anxious Enemy?

June 20, 2015

What do you think about when you think about perfectionism? Is it a force for good, or not so much? One of the great perks of perfectionistic thinking is that it’s aimed at creating a better world somehow. However, having a vision of something beautiful can also open up a huge abyss: an abyss between […]

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The AND Strategy

February 26, 2014

If you struggle with over-giving, or often get duped because you tend to only notice the good in people, then you’ll want to start practicing the AND strategy. The AND strategy asks us to be open to allowing opposites, or conflicting observations to be present at once. It defies the totalitarian logic of rational thinking […]

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