Sensitivity is Not a Sign that You’re Wrong

Being a Highly Sensitive Person (HSP) is quite the specialised topic. It’s a rather new concept and in many countries, it’s not really taken seriously, unfortunately.

What this means is that there are HSPs worried about having phobias or anxiety disorders, when in actuality, they are overstimulated. They don’t realise there is something that they can do about it and they also don’t realise that massive overstimulation can “look like” unfounded anxiety, especially to people who are not HSP.

Highly Sensitive Person looking at sign that says: you're wrongUnfortunately, a lot of psychological help available is still geared at trying to “talk things out” or labeling and medicating “problematic reactions” without necessarily exploring why these things are happening. There is a lot of “You have these symptoms. It’s a disorder we have a name for. The cause of the disorder is that you have a disorder.” But naming something doesn’t actually explain it.

There is also a lot of: “So, now we know why you behave this way and what the context is. You can tell a really compelling story about it. So now you can accept it and live with it.”

But that would be like saying: “So, we have explored when you first caught your cold. You can tell people what it’s like to have a stuffy nose. You understand the symptoms of a cold. So now you can just live with it the rest of your life!”

The short of it is: getting all your mental ducks in a row does not mean you feel organised or that your ducks suddenly love being all queued up. Mental insight is really just the very first step. The next step is to know what to do to make changes: how to get those ducks into a pond, instead of waggling around on concrete. How to get rid of your cold instead of learning to live with it.

The way I approach sensitivity – my own and that of my clients – I’m always curious to find out why the body /emotions / mind are strongly sensitive to something. Is it a fear, a warning, an intuitive signal, a sign of overstimulation? You can have the same “symptom” and yet it can be caused by lots of different factors. And no, I am not a doctor! Yet, you’d be surprised how many kinds of sensitivity are actually due to the body trying to communicate with you about things you can actually change yourself.

It really is a language, a language you can learn to speak.

Most of us were not taught to see our sensitivity as a language. We were taught it was gibberish we were supposed to ignore!

Just some random sdjhudf 74653047246 8r723$&&# 2#@@#$@#… like your body was butt-calling you by mistake.

People might say: “An @?? There is not supposed to be an @ reaction here! Clearly, you make no sense!” So then you learn to ignore those signs and signals and just go with what other people tell you you are supposed to feel and think and experience.

This can lead to all kinds of complications down the line! Complications like anxiety and depression and low energy that can then get diagnosed. But the question is, what is really causing it?

You see, when your body and soul are trying to communicate with you about what you feel and what you need and what works and what doesn’t work, it’s sending an important signal. Yet, if the signal doesn’t get through because it’s labeled as “I’m wrong” and then ignored, then you end up doing things that are not in alignment with what is right for you.

When you do this long enough, your body will start to yell at you to try to get your attention (which can feel like flat-out panic). Your energy will be low (because you keep choosing things that deplete you, without realising you’re doing this). You start to feel uninspired and down, because things just don’t feel good anymore.

In this way, something as seemingly small and innocent as thinking “silly me for wanting this / needing this / getting hurt by this” can turn into a long-standing habit of ignoring your own inner language of sensitivity. Not because you’re silly, but because you never learned to speak it.

This is why decoding all the seeming gibberish, and learning how your sensitivity is actually trying to speak to you can turn everything around. When you no longer need to manage symptoms, but instead understand the language within those symptoms, everything changes.

You can make small yet effective changes that improve how you feel and function.

Obviously, this affects everything: from work, to relationships, to health and to your sense of purpose and joy.


clarity call after post transp

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